" I'm eager to hear more about H1N1 vaccine availability. My husband and I would like to get vaccinated, but I don't think we fall into any of the priority groups. We were able to get one for my 12 month old last week at her doctor's office, but she will need a second shot in a few weeks. I hope they still have them available (or that they set them aside for babies who need 2 doses of the vaccine).

As far as college savings, I decided to go with the NY State 529 plan. It seems like a good plan, but I'm not a financial expert. I was also attracted to the tax benefits that it provides...I don't know how much of a difference it will really make in our taxes, but any little bit helps! I set up automatic monthly payments to the 529 so that we don't procrastinate on putting money in!

Upromise.com is a good site that you can link to your 529 plan. If you register your credit cards and shoppers club cards, you will get automatic contributions added to an account (they can then be rolled into the 529 plan). It's very easy to get a few cents here and there on purchases that you are already making. "

" SOME RANDON THOUGHTS FOR THE WEEKEND:

* With Thanksgiving now a few weeks away, Nick Jr. (formerly Noggin) is now playing its Thanksgiving song sung by Moose A. Moose. For me, it's the best song Mr. Moose does all year long, just ahead of the "Everywhere I go" song ...

* My wife in the past few weeks has put a lot of time and effort into getting some college savings plans going. It's such an easy thing to ignore, until you see how much it costs to go college these days. It's frightening to think what it might be in another 15 years or so.

* Sounds like the county health department is going to have some more details released Monday about H1N1 vaccine availability. We'll get the info. out there as soon as we can.

* A colleague told me weekend weather forecast is nice, especially Sunday. Hope he's right. Perhaps the last chance of the year to get to the playgrounds? "

" Lucky you!!! We had FOUR trick or treaters!!! I was really bummed...was hoping for more. Of course my husband is enjoying the candy. We took our little guy out, just to a couple of the neighbors, but he was so excited. I was worried that he would get nervous and shy, but he was his usual charming self. It amazes me every day how big and independent he is getting. Did want us to help him carry his treat bucket at all. We live on a dead end street so we were able to let him run a little bit, stepping in leaves and puddles. It was very exhilerating for him. : ) "

" What a great Halloween ... tons of kids in all kinds of costumes came to our door, and Ella went out and really appreciated and understood the tradition of trick-or-treating for the first time. For us, the biggest lesson learned was that 330 pieces of candy is not enough -- will have to remember to buy a fourth jumbo bag next year.

Hope you all had a great holiday -- on to Thanksgiving (I'm one of those people who don't want to talk Christmas until after turkey day) "

" Do they like books? How about coloring? Mabye a box full of coloring/crafty type stuff that they can pull out and be creative with might be a good idea.

I think that I'm going to create calendars with pictures of my sons for his grandparents and a very doting great aunt. You can do it through Walgreens' photo center and it seems really simple. "

" My daughter just turned 1 and I wasn't planning to give gifts that are specifically from her. I'm all about getting gift cards for the adults on my list...along with baked goods and photos of the baby. Grandparents especially love getting photos! I like to give gift certificates for local restaurants, bake some cookies, and give prints or an inexpensive photo book.

I do need to find ideas for gifts to give my nephews though (ages 3 and 5). I would like to get them something they will use or play with for more than 10 minutes! "

" Don't underestimate the value of those photos in those frames ... some relatives can't get enough of them.

One thing we've started to do, which Ella really loves, is making a card of some sort for a person and letting Ella do much of the decorating. She will color it, use glittery glue, tissue paper, stickers, etc. It's really cute when it's done and she is always so excited to give it to the person because she made it. "

" So Christmas is quickly creeping up on us. I'm struggling with what to give my siblings and their spouses, as well as my parents, from my son who is 1 1/2. I want it to be something meaningful but they don't need another picture of him in a frame. Help!!!! "

" I know it sounds simplistic, but it is incredibly sad and embarassing that we as a country have to take these steps to force the government to step and take some action. We preach about "No Child Left Behind", blah, blah, blah but before you can even begin to educate a child, you have to make sure that child is safe and cared for. I see it every day--kids who come from less than stellar homes. How can i expect them to care about literature or what is going on in China when they don't know if they will have food or be beaten when they get home? "

" I apologize for the long article I'm about to post here, but I thought it was an eye-opener -- very sad to see statistics like these:

Congress pressed to act to curb child-abuse deaths
DAVID CRARY,AP National Writer

NEW YORK (AP) — Armed with grim statistics, experts and activists are mobilizing this week to demand expanded federal efforts — including more money and tougher oversight — to reverse a recent rise in the number of American children dying from abuse and neglect.

Child-welfare advocates gathering for a rally and conference in Washington say America should be embarrassed to have a child-abuse death rate far higher than other wealthy democracies. They cite the latest federal figures showing that an estimated 1,760 U.S. children died from abuse and neglect in 2007 — up 35 percent from 2001.

"Child abuse and neglect are national problems that require national solutions," said Michael Petit, president of the Every Child Matters Education Fund. "That means federal lawmakers must work with states to address what causes it, be more consistent in how data about it are shared, and increase support for the agencies that work to stop it."

The recession is inflicting a further hit, with many states imposing budget cuts that affect child welfare programs. Abuse deaths are up sharply in some areas — authorities in Nevada's Clark County, home to Las Vegas, have tallied 37 abuse deaths so far this year, compared to 18 in all of 2008.

Every Child Matters is releasing a report Wednesday, a day ahead of the two-day child abuse conference, contending that inadequate resources are stretching state child-protection agencies too thin to properly serve at-risk children and their families.

The report — which brings together data compiled by a variety of federal, state and private agencies — says per capita spending on child protection varies widely by state, as does the diligence of state agencies in collecting statistics on abuse fatalities.

"The differences between the states are so vast that there's got to be a federal intervention that's stronger than present or these children will continue to die at these high rates," Petit said.

The report cited a survey by UNICEF in 2003 that calculated the U.S. child abuse death rate as 3 times higher than Canada's and 11 times higher than Italy's.

Among the report's recommendations:

—Up to $5 billion in additional federal funds to support child protection services.

—Adoption of national standards for child protection, to be mandatory for states accepting federal funds.

—Tougher, more consistent rules for how states collect and report data on child maltreatment deaths. The latest federal report on such deaths lacked data from four states, and Petit says other states may not include some fatalities that are in fact caused by abuse or neglect.

—A federal/state public education campaign to encourage reporting of child abuse and neglect.

Every Child Matters was organizing a Wednesday rally at the Capitol with support from Sen. Bob Casey, Rep. Patrick Kennedy, and stars from NBC's "Law and Order: SVU" — which often deals with family violence in its plots.

Casey said he hopes the week's activities will help "shine a light" on what he calls an epidemic of child abuse.

"As much of the frontline fight against child abuse takes place at the state level, the federal government must continue to work with states to provide resources," he said. "Especially as budgets are tightened, we must provide states with adequate levels of support."

However, the new report's recommendations were not universally welcomed.

Richard Wexler, executive director of the National Coalition for Child Protection Reform, said any additional federal spending would be better used to support at-risk families so fewer children would need to be removed from their homes in the first place. He contends that the number of child abuse deaths — while regrettable — is a tiny fraction of the number of children removed from their homes unnecessarily.

"Their proposal amounts to stealing $3 billion to $5 billion that might go to prevention, family preservation and helping to ameliorate poverty and spending it instead on investigating families and taking away children," Wexler wrote on in a commentary on the report.

Wexler agrees that many states should be spending more on child welfare.

"But all states need to spend smarter," he added. "The net of voluntary help to families should be cast wide. ... The net of coercive intervention into families should be narrow."

One goal of this week's conference is to press Congress to be generous with funds when it soon takes up reauthorization of the Child Abuse Prevention and Treatment Act, which provides federal money to states to address abuse and neglect.

"We need a bigger investment in case workers," said Rebecca Myers of the National Association of Social Workers, one of the conference participants. "Caseloads in some jurisdictions are as high as 60 or more, even though national standards recommend 12 or fewer cases per worker."

According to the American Bar Association, child protective services agencies received nearly 3.2 million reports of child maltreatment in 2007 but were able to screen only 62 percent of them for investigation.

"In short, our nation's child welfare system is stretched far beyond capacity," the ABA said.

___

On the Net:

Every Child Matters: http://www.everychildmatters.org/

National Coalition for Child Protection Reform: http://www.nccpr.org/ "

" It definitely feels like a true fall weekend!!!! "

" When I first heard that the little boy might be missing all I could think was "oh my god, I can't imagine what those parents are going through." Now...if they are as squirrelly as the media is making them out to be--and how normal can anyone be who has been on Wife Swap twice--I feel bad for the child. If they are that weird, should we be surprised that they would exploit their child like that? Look at the Gosselins. Enough sad. On a different note, just finished carving our "pumpkin family". I think I enjoyed it more than my little guy. For a little boy who loves to play in the dirt and sand and freezing cold water, he wasn't overly thrilled with slimy pumpkin guts!!! : ) "

" There's been plenty of skepticism expressed about whether the scare involving a 6-year-old boy and a loose weather balloon was a hoax after the young boy's response to questions on national morning news shows on Friday morning. Basically, when he asked to explain what me meant by a comment on Larry King Live that they "did this for a show" or something along those lines, the boy got sick and had to throw up.

What really disturbed me, though, was the fact that the parents kept putting the boy through more TV interviews even after he got sick. In fact, they had him sitting there with a container in his hands in a subsequent interview so he could throw up right there rather than have to walk away.

Was I the only one who found that extremely troubling? Perhaps this child pukes frequently so it was no big deal. But if it were me -- if I even decided to allow my child to go on a national TV interview -- the first time the child got sick would have been the last time that day for any such interviews. "

" I also get a kick out of how they can mix up the normal order of words when they start talking in complete sentences:

"What does 'tree's' letter start with?"
translation -- what letter does the word tree start with

Or ..

"Don't say me that."
translation -- at least when she's annoyed with me -- shut up, dad. "

" My little guy, who's vocabulary is growing every day calls sheep "baas". When we got our kitten Guiness over the summer, he would bellow "dinnnnnnnnnness" at the top of his lungs when he was looking for the kitten. : ) "

" Oh the memories... My oldest called watches 'arm clocks' and refrigerators the 'magic box'. My middle child to this day calls spaghetti-o's 'bat soup' (this came from the company promoting Batman at one time on the label) and soda was 'shoder', My youngest (3) since all the Halloween stuff has appeared calls anything scary-looking to him a 'Googan'. Don't ask me where he got that one from! His way of saying goodbye is seeyater, yub you. When he wants to go somewhere it's, 'gowhichyou'. I loved recalling these memories, thank you, you made my day. "

" One of the joys of having a toddler is watching their vocabulary development. What I really get a kick out of is the mispronunciation of words. Here are a few of my favorites from Ella:
"mosquito" is "pasquito"
"knife" is "ife"
"deodorant is "undermint"
"lap" is "laf"
In time, she'll know how to say all of these words, I'm sure. But it's so darn cute to see her talk. "

" We too noticed the change. Doesn't seem to have affected anything other than the name. I thought Noggin sounded cuter than Nick Jr. Oh well. : ) As long as they keep up the great work with their programming(minus the Fresh Beat Band) I'm okay with it. "

" We actually did MOST over the weekend and it is a great place to visit .. if your child is a little shy like ours, just give him or her some time to sit back and observe, get warmed up a little, but eventually they'll start diving into the fray. One warning -- at least on rainy weekend days, that place can be LOUD!

In other news:
We were a little startled at our house Monday morning to see that the Noggin channel's name had been changed to Nick Jr. ... I'll admit it has me a little worried that this is another step toward a more commercialized approach to that channel, but the big wigs deny .. Here's a URL to a section explaining the name change:

http://www.nickjr.com/support/name-change-faqs.html "

" I too have been wondering how to keep my little guy entertained this winter. He is very much an outdoors kid, so winter is going to be a challenge. I'm sure we will make another trip to the Museum of Play. I know there is a nice science center in Ithaca. Not sure how age appropriate it is, but it's supposed to be a nice place. "

" Yesterday's oppressively muggy weather notwithstanding, it's definitely been feeling more and more like fall -- trees are turning colors, nights are colder and longer. And as much as I don't want to think about yet, it's also getting closer to the time when outdoor activities with our little ones will be limited.

So I'm curious to hear from other parents out there -- especially parents of toddlers -- about indoor places they've discovered in the region. Last year, we paid visit to the museum of play in Rochester and had a blast -- definitely worth a day trip up there again this year. But what else. I've heard from some folks that the MOST in Syracuse is fun -- any one out there who can vouch for that? What about places here in Cayuga County -- visiting the fish and checking out the boats at Bass Pro is a favorite for Ella. "

" I know there are plenty of great places around here to pick apples, but Beak and Skiff in LaFayette has been a long time family tradition that we continued with my son for the first time last year. Can't wait to go in a few weeks(we usually combine it with a trip to the Applefest). : ) "

" Here's a suggestion for a fun family activity to do with toddlers -- apple picking. We went to a U-pick place over the weekend and Ella was very excited that she could pick apples of the tree and put them in the bag for us to take home. Many of the apple picking places are very child-friendly, with lots of things to do in addition to picking apples (which a toddler can only do for so long before getting bored). Here's a URL to a feature on the state dept. of agriculture Web site that lets you search for places to go:

http://www.agmkt.state.ny.us/AP/FFGSearch.asp "

" I was very sad to see the Child Care Council closes, as they played a very important role in helping us find the wonderful daycare provider that we now have. I'm glad that this organization has come in and is up and running to not only help people find a daycare provider but also to make sure that training and resources are available to the providers. "

" Some FYI on the new agency that's taken over for the former Child Care Council of the Finger Lakes -- this is a press release that came to us today:
__________________________________________________________________________

After a busy summer, Child Care Solutions has settled into its new Auburn location. The office is in the Custom Business Services co-op at 360 Grant Avenue. The office will be staffed Tuesdays, 11:00 am - 7:30 pm and Thursdays 8:30 am - 4:30 pm and will also be open for trainings and special events. With our Auburn site in place, Child Care Solutions is able to offer a full range of Child Care Resource & Referral services for Cayuga County parents and providers

Parents looking for child care can contact Child Care Solutions for free referrals to local child care and early education programs. Parents can speak directly to a referral specialist Mondays - Fridays, 8:30 am - 4:30 pm and Tuesday evenings until 7:30 pm by calling extension 303 at 315-446-1220 or 888-729-7290.

Busy parents can also obtain child care information by email at ParentHelp@childcaresolutionscny.org or they can search for child care 24/7 on the Child Care Solutions website at www.childcaresolutionscny.org. The website also has consumer information on regulations and child care financial aid.

Child care providers and staff from child care centers, Head Start and school-age programs can obtain the training they need right at the Auburn office. Child Care Solutions’ fall training schedule includes evening and Saturday workshops designed to meet the needs of early childhood professionals.

Child Care Solutions is also a clearinghouse for information about child care and early education. Providers can call the main office Monday - Friday, 8:30 am - 4:30 pm and Tuesday evening until 7:30 pm for answers to individual questions about everything from children’s behavior, training requirements, earning a CDA credential, starting a new child care program and much more.

Child Care Solutions invites providers and friends to attend our Auburn office Open House on October 1, 2009 from 5:00 - 7:00 pm. For more information, call Sue at ext. 315 at 315-446-1220 or 888-729-7290, "

" Having once again accidentally overheard the Fresh Beats this morning, I must correct myself --- the "Loco Legs" chorus ends with "we've got, we've got, we've got loco legs."

The Max and Ruby observation has been made in our household, as well. We often think the same things about the Wonder Pets -- why do the parents of these animals who need rescued only show up after the Wonder Pets had to come in and do their dirty work?

Today I actually have a different song in my head -- not sure if any of you have seen the show "64 Zoo Lane" but that theme song is addictive.

Have a great day! "

" That is the frustrating part about The Fresh Beat Band...while completely pointless, they are ridiculously catchy. Another question that my husband and I have pondered: Max and Ruby--where are their parents???? Ruby seems to be the primary caretaker of Max, who is obviously a handful. : ) "

" oh I did ask 3 doctors so far on the vaccine..
they all state the same as we hear on TV, at the moment there are no known side effects, other than the normal effects one gets from the seasonal flu shot.

I agree teacher, kids should be vaccinated, and what are parents that disagree thinking??

on 2-cents, I posted about my weekend automated call from the school board, issue of concern was not being notified if there was a confirmed case at school.

I re-posted yesterday, saying they must of had many nasty calls, as a letter came home yesterday, stating there is one or several CONFIRMED cases at the school.

our households have been vigilant daily with santizing. along with spraying down the car interiors too!

we have also sent disinfectant, hand sanitizer, and wipes to the classrooms at school/pre-school to aid them in the costs! "

" OLB: my granddaughter was over, and watching Noggin..
I was reading the paper, when the 'band' came on..I looked up and thought, the same as you?!
'stupidity' entered my mind, yet this is a station that promotes positive learning!
the little one was not fazed by my thoughts, as she danced and sang around the room! "

" What boggles my mind about The Fresh Beat Band is the fact that in all of their videos/clips, whatever they are, there aren't any preschool kids. It is mostly adults. And these "teenagers" look like they are in their 20's. I too wonder what marketing geniuses thought this would be appealing to preschoolers. It is an actual show that is one during the day. I don't know what it's like, because I haven't watched it, but I don't see how it can be even remotely preschool related. Anyone else? "

" When we allow our daughter to watch TV, it's usually one of the programs on the Noggin channel, which bills itself as "pre-school on TV." By and large, the programming is excellent and Ella enjoys the shows immensely.

But the last couple of months, in between regular shows, the channel has been bombarding us with musical videos for the "Fresh Beat Band," a group of four high-school aged kids named Kiki, Shout, Twist and Marina. I know their names not because I like them; it's because they've been permanently drilled into my head. The worst part, though, is the ridiculous songs they play are also stuck in my head. "I've got, I've got, I've got, I've got, you've got, you've got, you've got, you've got, I've got, I've got, I've got, loco legs."

My guess is that some marketing genius has told them this "band" (I put quotes there because it's obvious they lip synch everything and don't really play any instruments) is a potential gold mine.

If anyone is familiar with the "Fresh Beat Band" and has an opinion, I'd love to hear it. "

" Be sure to check out the Lake Life section of Friday's paper ... we talked to local schools about their preparations for swine flu and germ prevention in general. "

" My advice -- talk to your pediatrician about it and ask him or her specific questions about your concerns. They are the people at the forefront of this issue, and if they're good at what they do, they'll have put a considerable amount of time and thought into it.

Another really important thing to do is to reinforce good hygiene -- especially regular hand washing and to the degree possible with little ones, keeping toys, fingers, etc. out of their mouth. "

" Absolutely!!!! From everything I've read and have heard from multiple reliable sources, the swine flu seems to be most harmful to kids, because of the horrible vomiting and diareaha(i know that's spelled wrong) which leads to horrible,even deadly dehydration. But I'm also a firm believer in vaccinations. I refuse to get cause up in the hysteria that vaccinations cause autism. I know that if i have my child vaccinated he will be protected from these diseases if exposed(and there have been outbreaks of mumps and measles because of unvaccinated children) and I'm not willing to risk his life on the uncomfirmed/very unlikely chance he will suddenly become autistic. Sorry, I'll get off my soapbox now. "

" we are having the debate of should we have my daughter (10) and grandkids
(3 & 2) receive the swine-flu vaccine..

one side says: to aid them in NOT geting the flu is a great help.

the other side says: without knowing the long terms effects, we could be harming our child even worse..

will yours be getting the shot??? "

" Another point--my sibling lives in Arizona and can't wait to move back here. He loves CNY and can't wait to come back and raise his child here. Has said many times he does not want to raise his child in Arizona. "

" While I will acknowledge that there is some predictability to the fair, there were many things that I noticed--and things I missed--that I don't remember before. And I agree wholeheartedly, that for all the complaining people do about this area, I love that I am able to raise my child here, where he can experience things like the Fair and all the lakes. And we are within driving distance of some many other places. We have some family in Western NY and I'm toying with the idea of taking our little guy to Niagara Falls. May have to wait until next spring however as we are getting back into the the school year! "

" I'm happy to report we had a great time at the fair -- though today I think we're all suffering (at least I am) from a little "fair hangover." (And I swear I only drank half of a wine slushie -- just too much eating, walking, dancing, etc.)

Merry-Go-Round was also a favorite for Ella, and she successfully fished sharks out of a kiddie pool to win a small stuffed animal. A hidden gem we discovered was inside the track out where they have the circus animals. There's an inflated train that the toddlers can crawl through as much as they want for $3. Once Ella realized how to get through, she didn't want to stop. Watching the firetrucks parade and dancing to the Oak Ridge Boys for a few songs were other highlights.

A family member had commented to us recently that they probably weren't going to hit the fair this year because it's the same every year. Perhaps from an adult standpoint, I can see how someone would say that. But with children, it's amazing how the experience can change from one year to the next as they grow and become interested in different things.

The fair is one of the many reasons this region, for all the complaining we like to do, is a great place to raise kids. "

" Completely on a whim, I took my little guy(1 1/2) to the Fair on Saturday. I figured that we'd only stay a few hours, until he got tired, but we stayed the entire day. He rode in a stroller but when there was an open space and some grass, we let him out to run around and blow off steam. I was concerned about when he got tired because he can get really crabby, but he just fell asleep in the stroller, slept for a while and woke up ready for more. He loved riding the carousel(which I was able to ride on for free with him) that is in the little kids' part of the midway and you can get your picture taken for free with the Mystery Machine from Scooby Doo. He is an animal lover so all of the farm animals were right up his alley. He loved being able to pet the sheep and a baby chick. And it helped that he slept on the way over so he was refreshed right from the beginning. Hope you all have fun!!! "

" We're planning to make our annual family visit to the Great New York State Fair on Thursday night. Any tips out there for ensuring we have a fun experience with a 2.75 year old? Biggest goal is to have some fun and minimize the meltdowns. "

" I know that on Larry King Kate said that her children have very substantial college funds. And of lot of the stuff they've done, that they've received, etc. has been given to them. You would think that if they were frugal with the money they earned, they should have enough. But I suppose it depends on the lifestyle they are gauging that on. For us, living around here I'm sure it would be more than enough money. For the clothes, house, etc that they have--plus the dental, medical, toys, clothes for 8 kids(I can't imagine they have health insurance, right?), who knows? "

" I guess I just assumed that these two had enough money in the bank at this point that they wouldn't need to work -- their work could be raising the kids. They've been on a national TV program for three or four years, done a best-selling book, they have a million-dollar house, etc. ....

But perhaps I'm wrong and there really isn't enough money there to sustain a household that large for a long period of time. In that case, they are kind of trapped in a cycle -- they must continue to put themselves out there in the public eye in order to have money to pay the bills, but by being in the public eye, they're doing damage to the family --- all in all, it's just a really sad story. "

" After having watched the show pretty much from the beginning, I was very sad to see them divorcing. However, multiple times now both have said that it would have happened without the TV. And after seeing Jon's actions lately, I believe it. I saw Kate on Larry King the other night. At this point, I'm for Team Kate.She was very dignified, made sure not to bad-mouth Jon(no matter how much he might deserve it right now), and she fully acknowleged that what we all are reading in the magazines(which I've spent a ridiculous amount of money on) is such a distorted version of what actually is happening in their lives. Maybe it was all an act for the cameras, but I wanted to believe her. On the surface I agree that they should take a break from being celebrities and get their act together, but then I think--how on God's green earth does a single parent support 8 kids with an ex-husband who is out acting like a teenager and without going on welfare? Her training is in nursing. We all know that nurses, like teachers and law enforcement are grossly underpaid. What else is she supposed to do? "

" One of the traditions we have when we're away at the beach is to buy some of the celebrity magazines at the supermarket counter to have some mindless reading material laying around -- as a result, I got a big dose of the latest twists and turns in the Jon & Kate Goselin saga.

What I concluded from the articles is that it's difficult to see either side in a good light -- both Jon and Kate really seem to be obsessed with publicly humiliating the other. And that is extremely sad because it's difficult enough for children to deal with an "ordinary" divorce, and these poor kids have to see it played out in front of the world.

My hope is that both Jon and Kate can somehow realize that it's time to stop being celebrities. They had their ride, made lots of money, and up until this past year, it seemed like things were all for the benefit of the children.

Now, for the benefit of the children, let's hope they can find a way to disappear and get on with rebuilding their lives and establishing a new sense of family life for the children.

On another note -- and I raised this concern a while back, too -- I think this case illustrates the damage that these reality TV shows can do to people's lives. That's something that these media companies really need to start thinking about, especially when children are involved. It's one thing to find a group of consenting adults willing to have their lives recorded for the world to see; but children don't get the choice if their parents are forcing them into it. "

" Sorry for the prolonged lack of new posts on my part -- we just returned from a week at the southern Delaware seashore.

Whether it's the Atlantic Ocean or any of the local lakes, I wholeheartedly recommend taking your small children to the beach. They just absolutely love it -- grab a cheap bag of sand toys, some sunblock and a few towels and let the fun begin! It's the stuff that those wonderful childhood memories are made of. "

" my son is gong thru the fun stages of 'sharing' with his 2 yr old son.

as the recent parent conference at pre-school his daughter 3 yrs. was doing great/very advanced for her age too!

But precious little boy has major issues with sharing!
we are not surprised at we witness it daily at home.
the child loves cars! he becomes glued to one particular one for weeks on end, he eats with it,sleeps with it, it becomes a part of his hand!
NO ONE DAREs to touch it--especially his sister. Or the screaming MINE MINE begins!

of course there is the normal, a toy ignored but let his sister try to play with it, MINE MINE begins.

I suggested small steps:
get him to let you hold his car,
get him to let you PLAY with his car,
then get him to let sister join in
each time repeating the word SHARE,
while ensuring him he will have his toy returned... "

" OLB: I thought of you/potty-training when I was reading the farmers almanac!
It gave a list of dates per month as the best days of when to cut hair, buy a home, quit smoking, diet, wean, and of course potty train! "

" OLB: the start of YOU learning GIRLS control the bathroom, I hope you have second bathroom or think about adding if you dont, for when she hits her teen years! ...lol

she will be determined to stay there for it gives a reward after she goes!
she wants to PLEASE mom & dad!

More a girl characteristic than a boy, boys will not stay there long.

I would say 5 minutes is long enough..
praise her for trying.

Please don't make this mistake of putting on pull-ups during the night,or you will be in potty-training forever.

My grand-daughter was DONE in one week, rarely has a nightly accident.
her sister-older-about to be 5, STILL wears pullups to bed, always wakes up wet.
(different houses)

Use a good mattress cover, a simple sheet and blanket.
At all times use 'big girl' undies..

washing beats the costs of pull-ups, and teaches them faster!
good luck! "

" A potty training dilemma came up in our house yesterday, and I thought I'd pose the question to the people tracking this blog. How long do you let the child stay on the toilet of choice (we are currently fond of a portable frog potty) when nothing is happening but they have no interest in getting up because they insist something is coming? It's tough because you don't want to discourage them, but you can't let the child spend an entire afternoon sitting on the john. I won't divulge how long Ella sat there yesterday, but I will say that it ended with the setting of a timer and an agreement that she would get up when the timer bell rang. "

" this is from my local 10connects.com site:
pool safety ideas:

http://www.wtsp.com/news/local/
story.aspx?storyid=111253

also on 10connects.com is 'Momslikeme'
a great site for info "

" Teacher1 and cm's comments on the depression study make sense to me ... one thing that I worry about with a study like this is that it might lead some parents/doctors to putting their children on medication when it's not necessarily needed. That said, I think it's very important to pay careful attention to your child's mental health and deal with concerns just as you would any other medical problem (i.e. talk to the pediatrician about it). In the end, I guess I hope this study is simply kept in the proper perspective -- don't dismiss it outright but let's make sure it doesn't lead to half of the of 3-year-old population being on anti-depression medication. "

" I feel the only ages 3-6 depressed children are those that are in/have been in a very traumatic incident/household.
I don't believe they studied the average toddlers.

which do have temper tantrums, especially when/where we adults don't want them too!
My son was at the end of his rope when his screaming 2 yr old was just rolling on the floor!
I said just ignore him, after 5 minutes, try to calm him, if not wait another 5 minutes..
He hasn't had a huge fit in over a month! He is learning he will not get attention for a temper tantrum.

the key is to know your child..are they hurt, sick, teething, have a hard belly, OR is it just because they feel the need to scream right now! "

" at the age of 2 my daughter was catching lizards--something she still does ALOT! she also catches frogs, butterflies, and grasshoppers, she would be lost without her 'bug-bucket'

I would like to add, everyone here sounds like great parents yet learning..as we all do as we go along and depending on the situation at hand..

BUT I cannot stress enough..take the precautions and SECURE your doors, so the wee tots don't get out...
within the past 2 weeks we have had three kids ages 2 & under, get out the door and drown in the pool..

the items I have mentioned before:
door knob cover, latch hook, and door alarm will cost less than 10.00 per door,
I am sure your childs life is worth more than that to you! "

" I suppose it makes sense that if there is a family history of depression, that a child that young could already have symptoms. And obviously if a child has been through something thoroughly traumatic--yes. But aside from that, I would be very cautious to put that label on a child, especially one that young. I'm obviously not an expert in this area but as a special ed teacher, I've seen what classifying kids so young can do to their confidence and how they think others perceive them. "

" Here is a longer version of a story we had on our Nation/World page of today's edition. Interesting topic .. any thoughts out there?



Study: Depression seen in children as young as 3
LINDSEY TANNER,AP Medical Writer


CHICAGO (AP) — Depression in children as young as 3 is real and not just a passing grumpy mood, according to provocative new research.

The study is billed as the first to show that major depression can be chronic even in very young children, contrary to the stereotype of the happy-go-lucky preschooler.

Until fairly recently, "people really haven't paid much attention to depressive disorders in children under the age of 6," said lead author Dr. Joan Luby, a psychiatrist at Washington University in St. Louis. "They didn't think it could happen ... because children under 6 were too emotionally immature to experience it."

Previous research suggested that depression affects about 2 percent of U.S. preschoolers, or roughly 160,000 youngsters, at one time or another. But it was unclear whether depression in preschoolers could be chronic, as it can be in older children and adults.

Luby's research team followed more than 200 preschoolers, ages 3 to 6, for up to two years, including 75 diagnosed with major depression. The children had up to four mental health exams during the study.

Among initially depressed children, 64 percent were still depressed or had a recurrent episode of depression six months later, and 40 percent still had problems after two years. Overall, nearly 20 percent had persistent or recurrent depression at all four exams.

Depression was most common in children whose mothers were also depressed or had other mood disorders, and among those who had experienced a traumatic event, such as the death of a parent or physical or sexual abuse.

The new study, funded by the National Institute of Mental Health and released Monday in the August issue of Archives of General Psychiatry, did not examine depression treatment, which is highly controversial among children so young. Some advocates say parents and doctors are too quick to give children powerful psychiatric drugs.

Though sure to raise eyebrows among lay people, the notion that children so young can get depressed is increasingly accepted in psychiatry.

University of Chicago psychiatrist Dr. Sharon Hirsch said the public thinks of preschoolers as carefree. "They get to play. Why would they be depressed?" she said.

But depression involves chemical changes in the brain that can affect even youngsters with an otherwise happy life, said Hirsch, who was not involved in the study.

"When you have that problem, you just don't have that ability to feel good," she said.

And, in fact, Luby said she has separate, unpublished research showing that chemical changes seen in older children also occur in depressed preschoolers.

Dr. Helen Egger, a Duke University psychiatrist who also has studied childhood depression, said it is common among people in her field to first see depressed kids in their teens. Their parents will say symptoms began very early in childhood, but they were told, "Your child will grow out of them," Egger said.

Typical preschoolers can be moody or have temper tantrums, but they quickly bounce back and appear happy when playing or doing everyday activities. Depressed children appear sad even when playing, and their games may have themes of death or other somber topics. Persistent lack of appetite, sleep problems, and frequent temper tantrums that involve biting, kicking or hitting also are signs of possible depression, Egger said.

Luby said another sign is being preoccupied with guilt over common mishaps. For example, a depressed 3-year-old who accidentally breaks a glass might keep saying, "Mommy, I'm sorry I did that," and appear unable to shake off that sense of guilt for days, she said.

University of Massachusetts psychologist Lisa Cosgrove said she is skeptical about the accuracy of labeling preschoolers as depressed, because diagnostic tools for evaluating mental health in children so young aren't as well tested as those used for adults.

And Cosgrove said that while early treatment is important for troubled children, "we just have to make sure that those interventions aren't compromised" by industry pressure to use drugs.

Previous research has suggested that rising numbers of preschoolers are taking psychiatric drugs, including Prozac, which is used to treat depression.

Egger said that there is little research on the effects of psychiatric medicine in very young children, and that psychotherapy should always be tried first.

Dr. David Fassler, a University of Vermont psychiatry professor, stressed that depression in very young children is still pretty rare. However, without treatment, "it can have a devastating and often lasting effect on a child's social and emotional development," he said.

"Hopefully, studies such as this will help parents, teachers, and pediatricians recognize the signs and symptoms of preschool depression so they make sure young children get the help they need and deserve," Fassler said.

___

On the Net:

Archives of General Psychiatry: http://www.archgenpsychiatry.com "

" We've certainly gone through those periods when I wouldn't even think about taking Ella to a restaurant or any other public place that required some degree of sitting still and staying calm. I think they just have short phases like that. Right now, she's great at a restaurant because she's at the point congnitively where she realizes that it's a special adventure of sorts. She loves the idea of getting a drink with a straw, and we usually bring some crayons and a small pad of paper -- things that she enjoys doing. "

" You are obviously parents who think ahead and anticipate what could/would/should happen in situations. My son is starting to ease into those temper tantrums, not sitting still, fussy eating as he gets closer and closer to being 2. I find myself re-evaluating whether or not to take him to certain situations where he had been perfectly fine before. I'm also much more conscious of working things around nap time. I find it interesting that one of that milestone questions they asked us at his last check up was if he was having temper tantrums. I guess it was a small comfort to know that it is normal for that age. But as for visiting hospitals--hopefully if you daughter continues to have positive experiences visiting others, and if hospitals try to make things family friendly, then when a child actually has to be in the hospital(god forbid!) he/she might not seem as apprehensive about it. "

" CHILDREN AND HOSPITAL VISITS

My mother was hospitalized recently and we naturally took a trip to visit her, and we didn't think twice about bringing Ella along. Actually, letting my mom visit with Ella was a big reason for the trip because we knew it would give her a pick-me-up -- and it did.

Fortunately, the hospital had a small lounge area and my mom was well enough to move around on her own when we visited so we spent our time in that lounge. Ella quickly made a game out of some pamphlets that were on a table and we read lots of books. It would have been tough to have a toddler in a hospital room, especially one in which another person was staying, for any extended period of time.

But my parents and my aunt both mentioned that there was a time when hospitals strictly prohibited children from visiting. And I guess plenty of people still don't think it's a good idea.

We were careful to keep Ella close to us, washed her hands lots of times, etc. And we definitely wouldn't have thought about bringing her in if she had been showing any signs of illness. But I think it was a good experience for everyone involved as long as we did it responsibly and I'm surely glad we went.

Any thoughts on this subject? "

" One of the simple jobs about having small children is how they can take us back to our own pleasant memories of childhood at times. Two recent examples for me come to mind. One is reading Richard Scarry books and searching for Goldbug hiding in all the busy scenes that are on the page -- we just started doing this with Ella and she loves it, just the way I remember loving it when I was a toddler. The other came on Sunday while we were taking a walk around dusk and talking to Ella about fireflies -- I wanted to show her one up close so I managed to catch one with my hand after some difficult but fun trying. It took me back to the days when we used to catch fireflies and put them in a Mason jar with a screen covering on top to see them all light up (and of course, we'd eventually release them). Ella's still a little young to be an effective firefly catcher, but I know she's going to love it.

I guess my point in writing in this post is just to remind yourself that despite all the stress and anxiety we feel at times as parents, there's also so much joy they bring. "

" I woke up Saturday morning, noticed the sunny skies and looked up the forecast for the Cooperstown area --- the prediction of a washout for the day and night had been changed. We figured, why not?

So we threw all we could think of into the car, strapped a hand-me-down kayak on top and headed to a campground just outside Cooperstown. Ella, I'm happy to report, had a blast.

The key, which I've mentioned before, was to tell her as much as we could ahead of time about what we were going to do and how much fun it would be. From snuggling in the tent to roasting marshmallows to putting on our life jackets and heading out for a short ride on Otsego Lake, we let her know what to expect, and when it was time to do those things, she was very eager to participate.

Don't get me wrong. The trip wasn't perfect. She woke up with a night terror -- I'll have to blog on those in more detail some other time -- around 1 a.m. and probably woke up the entire campground. And my plan to have her tired out so she would nap on the way home blew up my face -- "it's too late for me to nap," she declared at 2 in the afternoon.

But overall, a great experience and one we will definitely do again (the other big bonus to it all -- spending $26 to spend the night) "

" our daughter has grown up camping, almost every year since she was born we've have camped.
She loves it.
It wasn't in our finances this year, but she's hoping it will be next year.
Bug Spray is the most important item to bring.

shortly if not already your little one will be opening doors on their own..walmart carries door handle covers, that are almost as hard for adults to open the doors! they are simple plastic covers that go over the door knobs--they work!
I would advise to buy some now--this way YOU can practice using them! lol

I have also added simple hook locks at the tops of my doors, where tiny ones can't reach. I spent the extra 20 cents(99 cents total) and bought the ones with the latch.
As the kids age the hook can just pop out, if its in their reach. BUT the latch has to be pulled back and then unhook--alot harder for a 5-7 yr old.

Since I have a pool, I also use the simple dollar store/walmart door alarms--should the door be opened the alarm would go off! they can also be used for windows. Inexpensive: 4 for 10.00.
(my pool also has an alarm!)

having my grandkids over --ages 2 & 3, I take extra precautions.

I recently read they make an new alarm for pools, that if something is on the BOTTOM of the pool for longer than 10 seconds it goes off. I hear that one is costly..
but after last week, an 11yr child drowned in a public pool with lifeguards, the city is looking into buying these types of alarms. "

" I have used counting, 1-5, on my daughter, at 10 yrs now I still use it!
She hardly ever gets to 4..it does work..you just have to be consistant, and follow thru with your punishment.

Swimming lessons should be started early! at 6 months they can learn to float easily.
I wish more people in FL. followed thru with lessons, as we have atleast one child per week all summer long die from drowning.
Kids have a natural ability to love the water..and it only takes a split second for them to be at the bottom of a pool.
Many drownings occur with several adults around! "

" Well, I found the tent and the air mattress after some digging around, but it looks like we're going to postpone our camping plans because of the rain forecast for Saturday and Saturday night. I don't want our first family camping experience to be remembered for being stuck inside a tent -- for some reason, I think Ella would get sick of that real fast.

On a semi-related note, I know there are all kinds of effective and beneficial ways to discipline toddlers, but let me share something we've sort of evolved into that is working well. Counting. When Ella is starting to lose control or just not listening well, we tell her we're going to count to three or five or ten -- whatever seems appropriate for the moment, and if she doesn't do what she's told, she's going to timeout. She's quickly adapted to it and it's been reasonably successful (nothing will ever be 100 percent successful). I think the counting kind of helps her settle down mentally. "

" Thanks for the info! I'll definitely look into it. "

" The Auburn YMCA has a parent/child swim lesson program that it says is geared for 6 to 36-month olds. Below is a blurb copied and pasted from the auburnymca.org Web site. More info is at the site under the Aquatics section. It might be worth checking into the Skaneateles Community Center, too, if that's potentially more convenient. Good idea to do that (start teaching them to swim), though --- we're definitely behind in that regard.


SHRIMP-SKIP
Parent and child of 6 months to 3 three years together in the water. Instruction is to the parent. Shrimp/Kipper/Inea/Perch - SKIP Shrimp - 6 to 8 months Child can control the head and sit with support from the hands. Kipper - 9 to 12 months Child can sit without hand support and stand with support from the hands Inea - 13 to 18 months Child can stand without support and walk with or without support or aid. Perch - 19 to 36 months Child can run and jump. Personal Safety topics - Pool tour and rules, Backyard pools, PFD's, Sun safety, Boating safety Personal Growth - YMCA values, networking, parenting tips, family enrichment Stroke Development - Water entry/exit, expelling water, breath control, balance, buoyancy, body positions, towing, arm patterns, leg patterns, use of IFD's Water Sports & Games - songs, movements Rescue - handling a child in deep water, first aid, rescue breathing "

" Swimming lessons--when is a good time to start? My little guy is only 1 1/2, but seems to already love the water. Obviously, I'm looking for something that will be fun for him, but wasn't sure if it was too early. If not, any suggestions where to go? "

" We're now thinking about going for a overnight camping trip, something we haven't done yet as a family. Part of me thinks she's going to absolutely love it; part of me worries she could be miserable. Any tips for toddlers and camping out there? "

" Well, we decided to take Ella out to see the Emerson Park fireworks on Friday night and she loved them. I was a little nervous because 1. it was late and she can be cranky when she gets tired and 2. fireworks like those are very loud and can be scary to some kids and small animals. I think it worked out well because a. Ella is at an age where you can explain things ahead of time so she knew what to expect and was excited to see b. we got there late (around 9:30 p.m.) so she wasn't tired from being there all day and c. we set up at a location that was a reasonable distance from the place where the fireworks were shot from, so the noise wasn't overwhelming. "

" Any suggestions for whether to take a 2.5 year old child to a fireworks show ... I'm thinking either she's going to totally love it or be totally freaked out by the loud noise. Maybe if we tell her enough ahead of time that fireworks are really fun to look at but that she should be ready for them to be really loud, she'll have a good time. Just not sure. "

" Sorry to hear about your puppy problems. We recently adopted not 1 but 2 kittens. Adopted one from an animal rescue last week and wouldn't you know that another one showed up on my parents' doorstep. Both are so cute and playful, and my little guy loves them, but he doesn't quite realize yet how much bigger he is than them. Even though I'm not a huge animal lover(my husband is the animal lover in the family) I can't help but love the smile that they bring to my son's face. To see him that happy--what more can a mom ask for? : ) "

" The dog story has an unfortunate ending --- no, Ella didn't repeat the mistake made by her father when he was 2 years old and accidentally sit on the puppy (my accident was with the guinea pig).

But upon bringing the new pooch home, we quickly realized that despite the fact that this particular mixed breed is generally considered good for people with allergies, one of us quickly began to have a strong allergic reaction to the doggie's presence. We had to bring her back.

Ella definitely loved the puppy, but she handled the return pretty well. She's at the point now where we can explain things to her in a straight-forward way. We just told her that the puppy was going to have to go back to be with her brothers and sisters because she was making one of us not feel well.

Maybe there is a dog in our future, but this wasn't the one.

Now back to focusing on potty training ... "

" I just got word that we officially have the new addition to our family -- here we go ....


I'll try to provide a report on how the first night went tomorrow morning. "

" It looks like we're going to finally stop delaying the inevitable and bring a new dog into the household. As some of you following this blog recall, we lost our beloved dog Morgan to cancer in the fall, and while we always knew we would have a new dog someday, we've been very cautious about bringing one into the house at a time when it will seem manageable for all of us. We've come to the realization that we can always come up with a reason not to get a dog -- but ultimately we just should do it and move forward. The fact that Ella is constantly walking around the house and yard with strings, belts, etc. talking about her imaginary doggie is a signal to make this happen, too. That said, I'm sure there will be challenges. Any advice out there? "

" When all this Tween Dora stuff 1st hit the scene a couple months ago, I was under the impression that little Dora would still explore on her show and would still be available for the younger kids. I didn't think they were messing around with her aspect of the character at all. I also didn't think the new Dora would even have a TV show, it was all just marketable items... but I really don't know. Having 2 Doras at all may not work out.

And I agree with you on the deciding factor being the way she carries herself. Boy crazy and vain are not qualities society's kids really needs any more of a push toward these days. I'd hate to see a character as wholesome as Dora become just another Bratz doll. Oye. "

" Probably "disgusted" was too strong of a word. "Disappointed" would be the better description.

I agree that she doesn't look like a "slut" or "tramp" with the new look, although someone mentioned a display they saw in a store recently in which the new Dora was striking a model's pose, which I don't think is necessary.

I guess a big question for me going forward is what they do with the character. I just hope her character doesn't spend her time worrying about boys and her appearance.

My biggest problem is that Dora has always been a show that appealed to pre-school children mostly, and this move was made to try to sell her to an older "tween" audience without any regard to the pre-schoolers who are now watching her. But the "tweens" are a lot more influential at getting their parents to buy all the promotional products so I think this is being done mostly to make money.

Kids grow and move on from the characters they followed at younger ages. Why can't we leave characters like Dora alone for future generations of pre-schoolers to learn from? "

" as a side note: The "c'mon people..." reference was aimed at those articles where they were lableing the older Dora a tramp... not at you Our Little Boss. Just out of curiosity though, what disgusts you about the whole thing? "

" This is absolutely happening at school. He's not alone long enough at home to do this stuff. Evidently, this happened at the beginning of the school year, since then his "girlfriend" has kissed him 2 other times, both at school, but "no tongue, mom. God".

Ugh. I have been struggling for days with how to handle this. I haven't done nor said anything yet as my 1st reaction was to ground him or print off pics of tongue cancer victims and tell him "SEE? This is what you get from french kissing!" lol. I think I'll try the "How did it make you feel" route. I'm hoping (being so young and not yet hormonally driven) it felt "weird" at best. At that time, I think I might try the "experimenting is normal and being curious is healthy, but you are very young and there's a lot to this you might not understand. Maybe you should slow down and save some of the grown up things for when you're a grown up".

But I just don't know.

As far as Dora. I think a lot of people are over reacting to this. So what if they are marketing a "Tween Dora"? I've only seen a few pics, but it's not like she's all tramped out. And as long as she maintains the innocent, smart explorer personna... perhaps there will actually be something for 8yo little girls to associate with that doesn't encourage them to make out on the play grounds. From what I just saw when I googled it, its the commentary about her being a "slut" or "hoed-up" that are WAY more offensive than lengthening her hair or traiding the shorts for a skirt. C'mon people. Let's talk about some of the "after school specials" on MTV before we start Dora bashing. "

" Wow -- it's stories like these that make me truly cherish the fact that Ella is 2.5 years old; I know we'll figure out a way to handle these kinds of issues as she grows up, but it's scary to think about.

One slight tangent that comes to my mind. Have you heard about the image makeover that's being given to Dora the Explorer? Just Goodle "Dora the Explorer makeover" and see what it's all about. I personally am disgusted by it. "

" 3rd grade???? seriously? well, that explains why by the time they reach 9th grade they are practically making babies in the hallways. And they don't seem to care when teachers say something to them. No joke, at my school 2 students got caught having sex in a very remote corner of the school. Have you no shame or class or respect for yourselves? you are so right mamaD, everything they see is so oversexed and violent. And it seems like while you can protect them and try to show them what is appropriate, that influence of "everyone else is doing it/has it/saw it" is a powerful thing.

And have you tried to buy little girl clothes that don't look like they should be on a street corner? it's tough. Going back to the 3rd graders french kissing--is this happening at school? in someone's home? If it's school I'd definitely be concerned about why these kids are alone long enough for this to happen. "

" OK. Here's one for ya... it has come to my attention within the past 12 hours that 3rd graders, EIGHT/NINE YEAR OLDS, are "french kissing". Once the initial shell shock of this tidbit of knowledge wore off and the risk of mom having a stroke faded, i started really thinking about a concept SO foriegn to me when I was 8/9 a little deeper. I realized that these kids and their french kissing adventures (my son says most of his friends have also already had this experience) are NOT hormonally driven. These kids are NOT "horny" at 8 years old. So where does it come from? Movies? TV? Radio?

Yes. It does. I have been single for many years, my son has not learned this by watching me, that's for sure. But... He DID learn what masturbation was from the 1st Transformers movie. I know what for a fact. Daredevil quickly replaced Spiderman as his fave movie a couple years ago... and they are straight up naked in that movie. Any of you ever seen Drake and Josh or the Naked Brothers? Some hormonally charged young boys, right there. Any of you listen to 107.9 ever? Hear songs like "Like it like a lollipop"? Any of you ever seen the game Grand Theft Auto? Where your missions consist of drug runs, picking up hookers, watching the car rock while you have sex with them, then you kick them out of the car, beat them up, take there money and run them over... complete with bloody tire tracks.

Fact is, times have changed. I didn't learn about french kissing from Bugs and Daffy, that's for sure. Atari taught me nothing about hookers. Although Jethro Tull caused me to question organized religion by the time I was 10, it certainly did not advise me to like anything lollipop style.

Here's my question/problem/crisis: How do you adequately explain to a YOUNG child of 9 about the reality of what he's doing/the path he's on without terrifying him, making anything sound dirty, making him feel ashamed or simply talking over his head? Especially when his media world is straight up SATURATED with this stuff?

THIS terrifies me more than anything else, to be honest. He is too young to grasp the bigger picture here. Soon, hormones WILL start flowing, and these kids are more educated and more experienced at 8-ish than I was at 14... than most of us were at 14. I don't have any idea how to tackle the birds and the bees with a 3rd grader... and if he's already french kissing, well, the next step is like 3rd base, isn't it? Oh. My. God. "

" Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there ... the weather might not be the greatest here in central New York, but it's still a wonderful day to relax with family. Enjoy! "

" mamaD wrote on Jun 9, 2009 10:14 AM
in my opinion you are doing the right measures with your son.
I have 3 older children 27(boy),
24 (boy), 22 (girl) and a 10 yr old (girl)!
I also raised my sister from 10-18 yrs.
(my mom died when she was 6)

you have to be ahead of them at all times! there will be times they will 'hate you' and yet times they will need you immediately.
I also met their friends, met parents of friends or they were simply NOT allowed to visit friends homes.

in the moment-NOW-your child will think you are nuts, overprotecting, or simply mean!
when he is grown, he will THANK you for being so caring, always insuring his safety, and it will aid him when he has kids of his own!

my 24 yr old son has 2 kids now, he is at times worse than me, and he used to call me the 'gustapo'--lol
right now his kids are only 2 and 3!
NOW he realizes the responsibility of parenting, IT NEVER ENDS!

as I tell him--be consistant! dont throw threats you have no intention of keeping.
Always let them know the rules ahead of time,
WHY there is a rule,
and what the punishment will be.
Give only ONE warning, then follow thru! "

" A small bit of good news to share on the unfortunate story that the Child Care Council of the Finger Lakes is closing its doors. A neighboring agency out of Syracuse is taking over, and by the looks of things, this agency really wants to work with the community to have the smoothest transition and provide the best services possible. Here's a link to the story on our Web site:
CLICK HERE TO SEE STORY "

" Interesting story that came across our wires .. I'll put the first few graphs here and link to the full piece since it's pretty long. Just thought I'd pass along since I know milk is such a big part of many families nutritional gameplan for their children:

Here's the URL:
http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/health/bal-te.fo.milk07jun07,0,735920.story

Here's the first few paragraphs of the story:

By: Laura Vozzella(c) 2009
The Baltimore Sun

<

Patty Sullivan is stumped by the dairy case. One kind of milk promises to make her children smarter. Another claims to come from healthier cows. Unable to sort all that out, she reaches for conventional Costco milk.

"I find it very confusing," said Sullivan, of Catonsville, Md., who picks up five gallons a week for the preschool she runs. "You need a research degree to find out the differences. And is it really that much better for you?"

Not long ago, consumers had to ponder only one thing before hefting a gallon jug into the shopping cart: How much fat did they want? Then, more than a decade ago, organic started showing up in traditional supermarkets.

Today, the world of milk is even more rarefied -- and more confusing, because the milk trucks are moving more quickly than the science. Researchers can't even agree if milk "does a body good," much less which kind is best. While consumers can have their pick of more milk varieties than ever before, they also have more questions about a product considered to be a cornerstone of childhood nutrition -- one that each American, on average, consumes at a rate of 24 gallons a year.

There's milk from grass-fed cows, said to be more nutritious and better for the environment. Milk with added omega-3 fatty acids, touted as boosting brain function. Nonhomogenized milk that fans are willing to shake before drinking -- in glass bottles, no less -- on the premise that their bodies won't absorb as much fat if it hasn't been blasted into tiny bits.

Ultra-pasteurized. Low-pasteurized. Unpasteurized "raw" milk. With soy, rice and almond milks suddenly mainstream fare, the dairy case has become more crowded than a feedlot. And none of it is cheap.

While Sullivan spent about $2.25 a gallon for milk at Costco, Wendy Johnson, a special-education teacher, pays more than twice as much for organic. She shells out even more -- about $14 a gallon -- for individual, juice box-like containers of organic milk for when the family's on the go.

Johnson figures organic is best for her 5-year-old daughter, but she has some doubts, precisely because of those handy "shelf-stable" boxes that don't need refrigeration.

"If you can put it on the shelf, what's left in it?" Johnson wonders. "

" Terrifying, you bet. As my son is almost 9, I do allow him to venture the 1/2 block up to his friend's house, the other house he's allowed at is a little further away (you know, like, 4 more houses up) but I know the parents there and feel pretty secure... although, I do see their kids running the streets unsupervised all the time.

The hardest part is, for me, explaining to him why his friends can run the streets until 10pm most nights, unaccountable to anyone, but he has to be in by 7:30-8:00 and I demand to know where he is at all times. He is strictly NOT allowed in ANYone's house without my prior consent. Period. He's been grounded for that one already. Falling back on the "I don't care what 'johnny' does. I'm not 'johnny's' mother" feels like a cop out and I remember how much I hated it when my parents said that stuff to me.

My son is a good kid, though. I've caught him getting wrapped up in some of that unsavory behavior that a few of the neighbor boys get into, but he always gets caught (I hope lol), and mom always brings it to his attention with specific examples of why he shouldn't continue acting in these ways. 9 times out of 10, tears of embarassment follow these discussions.

My advice? Stay involved. Stay on top of what's going on with your children. Over bearing mom's raise good kids. :) Kidding a bit there, but you know what I mean. These days, my son stays out of trouble making behavior (well... most... he is still just a kid and sometimes bad behavior is just toooo tempting) simply out of sheer terror that "mom's watching and she yells at me... AND my friends"! LOL... it works though, and if "mom's voice" becomes his conscience... well, personally, I'm ok with that. "

" mamaD--it seems terrifying to me, as the mother of a less than 2 year old. I see what my high school students are like and I pray that my son does not end up like most of them. There are a couple of students who look at and I think "now that is the kind of kid I want my son to be like" or "that is the type of girl I hope my son dates". But most of them scare the ever lovin' out of me. I know that I will be like you, that mom who keeps tabs and prefers the kids at your house. How do people handle the whole letting your kids go to other people's houses? I am very paranoid about who my child will be exposed to, what they will be exposed to...you get my point. ???? "

" All this talk about kids unsupervised. This is an issue in my neighborhood recently. I'll tell you, my 9 year old is allowed out alone but only if he is in my yard or at one of two other houses, both within eye/ear shot. I'd never let him down to the school without me at this age. Ever. And if the kids are playing at our house (preferred)... I am one of those horribly embarassing mom's yelling out the window things like "I better not hear that word again" or "get out of the road" or "stop throwing rocks"!!! At this point, I think my son is mortified, but as he gets older and is allowed more priviledges, I hope that he will see the so-called "hoodlums" and not want to engage in that behavior. And he won't be allowed to roam freely for several more years, and even then, only with specific destinations and time frames set in effect. You can only do the best you can do. Then... you set them free and hope it's enough. Scary, eh? "

" I would still carry a 'copy' of the childs birth certificate, and vaccinations...best to be prepared just in case.
becareful what you pack in the carry-on bag..especially liquids or medicines.

as OLB said CALL the airlines..the rules seem to change weekly. "

" We flew a couple of times this past winter and here's what we experienced:

1. No ID was needed for the child -- she had to go through security like all of us, but they only asked for our IDs. She did get a boarding pass as we bought a seat for her.

2. Jet Blue, US Air and United all allowed strollers and carseats and they didn't count as carryons as long as the carseat was actually strapped into the plane seat for her to use and as long as we gate-checked the stroller. They put a green tag on the stroller at the gate and then you pick it up when you get off the plane.

It's still probably a good idea just to call the airline ahead of time and double-check, though, because things seem to change in the airline industry all the time.

Hope this helps -- good luck! "

" Has anyone flown with a little one lately? I'm just wondering what kind of identification, if any, we will need for our little one, as we go through the security checkpoint at the airport(we are staying domestic, nothing overseas). Also, we are bringing a carseat on the plane, and will be checking a small stroller. Does that count against us as far as a carry-on? None of the airline websites I've looked on are crystal clear. Thanks!!! "

" There have been many times when I've found myself rushing my son along because we are "in a hurry". But then I stop, realizing that I'm not going to have these moments forever. If he wants to take an extra 30 seconds and stare at the big trucks and busses that he loves so much, why not let him? Going for a walk is very time consuming if we let him walk, rather than riding in a stroller, because he is constantly turning around to look at things that have gone by or to look at where certain sounds were coming from. That curiosity is so refreshing!!! I get frustrated with myself for being impatient and 'always in a hurry', while at the same time I complain about the lack of curiosity in my high school students. I hope that my son will continue to be as currious at 17 years old as he is right now at 17 months. "

" It's hard to believe it's been 20 years since the release of "All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten" by Robert Fulghum. That booked popped into my head yesterday as we were visiting the zoo in the Syracuse.

While exploring the zoo, Ella reminded me of an important lesson -- life is not always a race. As we were going from exhibit to exhibit, Ella would become fascinated by certain animals and just want to watch them for what seemed like forever. Our urge as adults is often to see the animal for a minute or two, perhaps glance at the exhibit sign and move on to the next one. There is an entire zoo to see, right? But it hit me while Ella was not interested in leaving the big-horned goat exhibit that there's no good reason to rush through a zoo -- or an art museum, a nature trail, an amusement park or anything else. She eventually was ready to move on to other exhibits. We took the general approach of giving her time to soak in what really interested her, and it made for a very enjoyable day -- for all of us. "

" Lots of good discussion (and horror stories for those of us with toddlers to look forward when our children get older).

What are everyone's thoughts on the age when it's OK to let the children out and about on their own to play -- I see plenty of kids from I'd say 8 to 14 clearly without parents at parks and playgrounds. To be honest, I know at a certain point in my childhood, we had some freedom to ride our bikes to the school or go from one neighborhood friends house to another during the day. But I can't rememember how old I was when this started happening. Any thoughts on what's appropriate -- and what ground rules need to be established once they are given some freedom? "

" teacher1: a carry over from 'two cents' a few days back, I agree as my daughter has ONE of THOSE in her class, the whole class suffers!
Older parents usually are too tired to 'deal with it' or simply spoil the child beyond belief.
My first child was born was I was 20. My last, and the only one home since she was 6, was born when I was 37.

there was a time when I noticed she was turning bratty, expecting everything for doing nothing..alot due to her being spoiled. Being the only child home --with our lives beng more settled, it's easier to spend money and take her places.
This also was a practice of her older siblings---spoil the child!
no one meant it to be harmful, which it was only at home, at school she was the perfect child!

However, before it got out of hand, MEAN 'ole mom put her foot down!
there were some screaming fits at stores when she couldn't 'get something from EVERY store' which were followed by 'time-outs' when we got home.

very true PARENTS need not be in denial.

even at 10yrs I give her a warning, then I start counting (5 is timeout/or lose something she cherishes like her Wii) most family members are amazed I hardly ever get past the number 3..and she is doing what I asked!

she also recieves alot of praise for 'good things' like her straight A's thru the whole school year with excellant behavior!
this will also cost me 40.00 (5.00 per A) plus a bonus for the whole year, which I haven't decided the prize yet! "

" As a teacher it is incredibly frustrating when parents are in denial/oblivious/don't care about their child/ren's bad behavior. It truly ties a teacher and administrator's hands when they don't have the support of the parents. I know that there are people who might argue that the teacher just needs to be better about discipline, but there is a big difference between dealing with a student who is difficult once in a while and a student who is CONSTANTLY disrupting the classroom. You begin to feel more like a prison guard, simply trying to prevent chaos, rather than any actual teaching getting done. And it does affect the education of all of the students in the class. There is a scary pattern of enabling going on. It frightens me to think that these kids are going to constantly be bailed out by their parents and the teachers who enable them. Feff100--this boy in your child's class--i don't doubt that when he is older and gets caught selling/using drugs, robbing a bank, attacking his girlfriend, that his parents will claim "he's just being a boy." I know I sound cynical, but after having taught for 10 years, I've seen this a lot and it makes my job ten times harder than it already is. I know I"m making some generalizations that are probably going to upset some people, but GENERALLY speaking, it seems to be the parents who are significantly younger and the parents who are significantly older who tend to be more enabling. The younger ones never got a chance to be kids themselves and are soooo terrified that their kids won't like them. The older ones...I'm not sure. Guilt? When my son is school aged, and God forbid he is a holy terror in school, I really hope that I will be able to be objective enough to listen to both sides and not take either the teacher or his version at face value. "

" OLB: the most we can do is hope by that age we have trained our children to be respectful of others and their property, to use their manners, and to
always THINK first:
ASK themselves, is their behavior/actions/or words something we parents would allow them to do in front of us??? what would mom say? what would dad say?

of course they will test the waters, but that will be occasionally not repetitive.

years ago (1988) there was a set of books out on behaviors for the wee ones to understand.
such as: a childrens book about LYING
by Joy Berry
there is a whole series: being bossy, being mean, being messy, being rude, being wasteful, disobeying, snooping, stealing, teasing, whining, etc.

check your local library or ebay! "

" Let me start by saying that my children are FAR from perfect. That being said, I don't know what is going on with parents turning a blind eye to thier children's behavioral problems.
There is a child in my son's 3rd grade class that is a terror. He is always touching the other kids,- slapping lightly, not hurting, just annoying. This child whispers things to the other kids to make them mad and then when the other kids react, they get in trouble.
I had heard about this child from my 9 year old son. But I never dreamed he was telling me the entire truth until I saw it with my own eyes. This poor boy could hardly contain himself- he was pushing and tapping the other kids, he would say snide comments to them under his breath to get a rise out of them. It was completely amazing to me! But it also seemed that the young man in question could not control himself.
I talked to a few other parents and found out this boy had been moved from class room to class room at least 3 times this school year because he was so disruptive! One mother told me that his parents don't think there is anything wrong with the way he behaves and chalk it up to "he's a boy". Well, he's more than "just a boy" and he needs help - be it counseling or medicine to help control his impulses.
How do parents do that? Just stick thier heads in the sand and pretend that thier child is an angel and that all kids act like that? Its not fair to that little boy to have his parents not help him.
And consequently, is not fair that my child and others in his class have to put up with his shenanigans because the parents won't admit thier child is not perfect and that he needs help. "

" Last week we had some coverage in The Citizen of an attack on ducks in Hoopes Park by some apparently unsupervised children -- the story generated a lot of response about parental responsibility when kids do seemingly unthinkable things, like stone small animals to death.

It's sad to say, but the story did not surprise me, having witnessed children in the park and at the nearby Herman Ave. Elementary school playground. It's quite common these days to see groups of unsupervised kids -- perhaps around 10 at the low age of the spectrum and 14 at the high end -- running wild. To be fair, a lot of it is inocent fun, but we also hear our share of unthinkable language. Especially at the playground, these kids will run, push and jump without any awareness, it seems, of the much smaller children playing on the same equipment.

On times when it has gotten to the point of being too much to take, we have said something to the kids -- "Hey, you need to stop talking like that" -- or "Please watch out for the little ones." What's interesting is that much of the time when it comes to that, the kids actually do tone things down. They're a little embarrassed, too.

I know that I'm in for a whole different set of challenges when I become a parent of child at that age, so I don't profess to have the answers about how to deal with children at that age.

But given the recent news of the ducks and the things I've seen, I'd love to hear some thoughts on the subject. "

" OLB: with my kids I used more of their knowledge level than the word NO.

example: if they understand what a boo-boo is and how it hurts, I would say
'ouch you gave the wall a boo-boo with your crayon, walls don't want a boo-boo, but papers loves crayons, paper and crayons hug all the time'

you have to replace the NO with a positive reaction. be consistant and soon you will be amazed at how they want to aid paper and crayons in their hug!
use NO for serious harmful actions, very loud and stern! "

" OLB: Ella is ready to be potty-trained.
the key to the issue is to take one full week off! Do nothing by potty-train!
as you are preparing for that week,prepare with FAV snacks especially drinks, cute big girl undies of her FAV character if possible, and stickers or whatever your reward plan is.
of course sing the 'pee pee in the potty' song!

also right now in the AM when she first wakes have mommy go potty and put the 'big girl' on her potty chair nearby. This will ease her into your 'week' quicker.

I was putting my daughter on the potty every AM since she was 6 months old..she was NOT afraid of it when her 'week' was due. "

" Do you sometimes feel like 50 percent of the conversation you have with your toddler involves telling her not to do something? Don't throw that? Don't use your crayons on the wall? Don't bang the furniture with a spatula?

It's can be frustrating to feel like "Dr. No" all the time, but it's amazing how quickly Ella learns from these moments. I think kids are just programmed at this age to experiment with everything they can think of in order to find out what is and isn't allowed -- it's our job as parents to be there so they can learn.

Then again, there are some things they probably never learn completely. Ella took a frightening tumble after leaning back in a chair over the weekend -- she was fine, didn't even bump her head, but was quite startled. That's when my mother -- a retired first grade teacher -- and my mother-in-law -- a retired seventh-grade teacher -- both said they constantly had students who despite numerous warnings would wind up on their backs in the classroom because they lost control of their backward-leaning chair.

Maybe Ella learned the lesson early enough to not repeat it when she's a teenager. "

" It is extremely hard to know what is going on when they can't articulate what is wrong. and when they are sick and you can't do anything to help them--that is the absolute worst feeling in the world. we went through that last week. our little one was running a high fever--104--for about 4 days. took him to the doctor earlier in the week, even had bloodwork done, and everything came back normal. still running the fever. the doctor kept telling us it was a virus that had to "run it's course" as I'm trying not to think about my baby's brain boiling away. He's much better now, but when they are sick and there's not much else to do but wait it out, it's a crappy feeling. Am I being overly dramatic? : )

And of course, while he was sick he was rather "babied". so now we are trying to get him back on track, regular schedule, no more bottles(Mommy is weak sometimes). Thank goodness for our daycare provider. Having that routine to go back to has made things a lot easier. "

" One of the toughest things about parenting kids in the early years is figuring out what's going on when they're not being themselves. Even when they have a decent early-child vocabulary, they can't articulate well what's bothering them.

Are they sick and need to go the doctor? Are they working on some more teeth and could use some Tylenol? Are they simply going through a behavioral phase that needs some redirecting?

We've been dealing with that to a certain extent lately and I honestly think it's been a combination of all of those things. She's been to the doctor a couple times in the past few weeks, and we've gone from treating a sinus infection to now focusing on the likelihood that she has some allergies (which makes sense given the medical history of her parents). At the same time, she's definitely struggling to sit still at meal time lately (by that I mean, she won't stay in her chair -- she gets urges to get out play with the dining room curtains), and we're working hard to get her back into a better habit. But we've also been wondering if her reluctance to sit down and eat has been a symptom of something bothering her stomach.

I think the lesson I'm learning is that you have to always be open to possibilities about what's going on with them -- most importantly, you have be very observant about what they're doing and going through. We don't need to call the doctor every day but we also need to realize that sometimes they do need to go there even if we have a hunch it could go away on its own. "

" Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there .. now stop reading this blog, relax and enjoy your day!

But please come back to read on Monday :) "

" Thanks for the advice. That's pretty much what we've been doing. Our daycare provider tells the kids "kind hands" when they hit and shows them how to touch their friends gently. He definitely understands that. As for tweens and teens, all i can say is God help you. : ) Seriously, as a teacher I see it every day. All I know is that, somewhere boys think it's okay to hit girls and push them around, calling them nasty names, and become very possessive when they are dating, and then harassing when they break up. I know it sounds like a bad Lifetime movie or after school special but it happens very frequently and at younger and younger ages. Please please make sure teenage boys know that this is not how you treat a woman. Okay, I'm getting down from my soapbox now! Happy Friday! "

" Hitting is a normal part of developement, especially for a little one who hasn't learned how to express feelings with words so much. Be patient, tell him it's not nice to hit, explain about hurting... if it becomes worse (you know, windmill effect with the arms) putting him on your lap and holding his hands, talking calmly until he calms down works. He's a little too small for "time outs" at this point, but I found this worked with my boy when he got older. If it becomes a full blown tantrum, the best thing with my son was to literally step over him, TELL him that you don't understand him and then ignore him until HE calms on his own. As long as he's not hurting himself in the process of tantruming, it'll work. He's looking for a response... when there isn't one... he will find another way to communicate his needs.

What I need is Tween Boy advice, you guys. Mouthy, independent, too smart for their own good boy tweens! Help me! LOL "

" Good to hear from you, plasmatronix. Be sure to share some of your observations on six-month-old child raising when you get a chance, too.

"Super Nanny" certainly offers plenty of practical advice -- and probably for a lot of parents, seeing some of the cases that the super nanny takes on makes us all put our daily challenges in perspective.

One thing that I think we as parents are fortunate to have in these times is a wide variety of information sources through the mass media. Whether it's TV shows like that one, or Web sites or parenting magazines, there's tons of places to research information and just browse to pick up interesting ideas.

The down side is that we can go overboard with our research (especially), and sometimes cause all kinds of needless worry for ourselves. "

" I haven't lived through toddler years with a child yet (my baby is only 6 months old), so my only first hand knowledge of dealing with the terrible twos is through my nephews. I remember when they went through stages of yelling "no!" over and over. One of the biggest things to help seemed to be keeping them on a predictable schedule. Being proactive and heading off meltdowns before they occur can help. Maybe making a set time for the child to rest or nap would help, making sure they have a snack *before* s/he gets too hungry, etc.

A good place for tips on teaching young children appropriate behavior is the Super Nanny TV show. She uses behavior modification principles that research has shown to be effective. As part of my graduate studies in psychology we were actually assigned to watch Super Nanny as "homework" for our behavior mod class. That has probably been one of the best/easiest assignments of my college career! Anyway...Jo (the nanny) applies behavior mod principles very consistently and teaches families how to use them. It's a good show to pick up some tips! "

" If anyone has some thoughts on the challenges that Teacher1 is describing, please offer them here.

I guess the first thing I'd say is to be sure to discuss these issues with your pediatrician -- they know a ton about child development and behavioral issues and can probably give you some good guidance.

My guess is that you don't have anything big to worry about -- but it is something that you should address. I can remember Ella getting a little more prone to frustration around that age, as well, and I think the lack of vocabulary at that stage of development is a big source of why they might act out in a physical way. We just made it very clear to her (through our tone, our use of timeout, etc.) that hitting, being destructive was not an acceptable way to act and it eventually got through her head.

What do other readers here have to say? "

" I don't know about the terrible twos, but my little one is only 16 months old and he's become very obstinent. He's hitting-which seems to happen the most when he's tired, he's started kind of yelling, into everything. i want to think that some of this is normal and it's out of frustation or something because he can't talk yet or he's asserting his indepdence or something. ?????? i don't want to think that i've already messed my kid up in some way. advice? suggestions? "

" You hear a lot of people talk about the "terrible twos," and I certainly understand where the term comes from. But it's so inaccurate to think of this age as being dominated by frustrated toddlers whining their parents' ears off all the time.

The truth, this for me has been an amazing time because of the growth we can witness in our child on an almost daily basis. I'm not talking about physical growth (although I do have moments where I just stare at her remembering how tiny she once was.) What I'm most blow away by is the new things she says and does. I'm talking about her saying "I want to eat something spicy," and when I offer some pretzels, she looks at me with disdain -- "no, not pretzels, something spicy." Or just watching her play imaginary games with herself, pretending that we're painting and looking at my imaginary canvas and saying "Dada, that's so pretty."

So if you're new at this like me and you haven't hit that magical 24 month mark, don't be all that fearful -- it's really a lot of fun. "

" A couple of weeks ago a reader commented about grandparents helping potty train their child years ago. It was a unique circumstance -- the child had to stay with the grandparents because of a health issue in the family -- but it got me to thinking about how crucial a role grandparents can play in the healthy development of a child.

We just finished back to back weekends visiting grandparents on each side of the family, and we're really blessed that they care so much about Ella. It's something that will surely help her as she grows (it already has, actually), and we need to remember to be thankful for that. I'm not sure off the top of my head when "Grandparents Day" is on the calendar, but it's good to show appreciation for what they do all year long. "

" Here's what the American Academy of Pediatrics Web site has to say on when to start potty training (By the way, I'm glad I looked it up, because I discovered that they have a really great Web site aimed at parents):

"When is the right time to start toilet training?

"There is no set age at which toilet training should begin. The right time depends on your child's physical and psychological development. Children younger than 12 months have no control over bladder or bowel movements and little control for 6 months or so after that. Between 18 and 24 months, children often start to show signs of being ready, but some children may not be ready until 30 months or older.

"Your child must also be emotionally ready. He needs to be willing, not fighting you or showing signs of fear. If your child resists strongly, it is best to wait for a while."

The rest of the page goes on to offer tips, guidelines, etc.. It can be found at this link:
http://www.aap.org/publiced/BR_ToiletTrain.htm "

" It's a strange thing to think that because they are overtired, that they struggle with sleeping soundly, but it seems to happen. On the nights when I know my little one should be exhausted and crash right away, he seems to struggle the most to fall asleep and tends to have the most restless nights. There was a time when we were coming back from a very exhausting all day family event and my little one just started crying---and wouldn't stop. There was nothing that would console him. He just cried and cried until he exhausted himself. It was rather upsetting for us and really emphasized how important it is to stick to his routine as best we can. I know it's not always possible, but it really messes him up if it's not even remotely followed.

As for potty training--i've heard boys start later than girls, but when exactly should we even be thinking about it? "

" We appreciate the insight, Proud Grammy. I also think the moon definitely affects sleep patterns for many of us.

Another important factor for Ella is a solid nap each day. She still takes one in the early afternoon, and on days when that gets disrupted, she can struggle -- perhaps she's overtired. "

" I was forever grateful when my husband became very ill and his mother took Sara home to Massena with her for the three months her father was in the hospital. When we all were able to go back to being a family, my little Sara came home, potty trained! Every first-time parent should be so lucky to have in-laws like that! "

" Growth spurts interrupt sleep the same as teething, illness, and changes in the weather. Adults begin to have trouble sleeping when the weather teases us with a few good days here and there,and so do children. Cabin fever is stressful to everyone. "

" We've got a big challenge ahead of us, one that we've admittedly been putting off. Sooner or later, though, we're going to have to dive head-first into potty training with our Ella.

I'm pretty sure she's going to do OK; she's always been eager to "grown-up" things and prove that she's a big girl. But I'm still apprehensive and am eager to hear any tips that experienced parents can share.

So please, share away (and despite the subject matter, let's keep the language clean :) ) "

" Oh yes, a full night's sleep is a precious thing. Our 15 month old has very few of them. He might wake up for a few minutes, once or twice. but even that is enough to interupt not only his sleep, but our's as well. I don't know how many times a day I'm told how tired I look. On the rare nights when he does sleep all night, I often suddenly wake up, thinking "Oh my gosh, is something wrong?" I will say, with the nice weather we had last week, the nights that we went to the playground to play after dinner, my little guy slept like a rock. I can't wait for consistent good weather!!!!!

On a different note, my little guy-15 months old, only child--seems to be hitting the terrible two's a bit early. Is he just testing boundaries? Do I have a little devil on my hands? He raised quite a ruckus at daycare the other day--hitting, taking toys from other kids, throwing food, etc. Advice? Suggestions? And of course, he's already learned the art of a cute smile and batting his baby blues. Sheesh! "

" Here's a warning for parents of relatively newborn babies -- once your baby starts sleeping through the night, it's a big relief but it doesn't last forever.

At least in our case.

Perhaps it's related to growth spurts, but it seems that every couple of months, our 2.25-year-old goes through a streak of nights where she wakes up in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep. We just had such a stretch, and thankfully, have now had three nights in a row of her sleeping through the night again. We've been giving her stickers in the morning for sleeping all night, and she's genuinely proud of herself. Hopefully we can get it to become a habit again, but I'm sure there's another bout of sleepless nights somewhere in the future.

The battle never stops -- so savor those nights when you can get complete sleep. "

" I just discovered that I somehow deleted the past three months worth of posts to this blog. I just copied and pasted the most recent entry from that batch, made on Tuesday, and I'll try to find out if we can retrieve the deleted material and post a link to it soon.

Sorry for the mixup. "

" We've had a few nice days here and there, but it just feels like we're on the edge of consistently decent weather -- though I still fear one more wintery blast is in story.

It's got me thinking about outdoor things to do with Ella, and one of her favorites last summer was to go to the playground.

I'm wondering what others think are the best playgrounds this area has to offer. We've spent a good amount of time at Herman Avenue elementary school, which has a solid setup -- though it seems like it's becoming a tween hangout of late, and sometimes it just doesn't mix well with toddlers (disturubing conversations we have overheard there is a future topic).

The town of Owasco playground by the fire station is quite nice, especially because the equipment is spread out so the kids are bumping into each other as much.

Emerson Park has some nice pieces of equipment, though it's a little on the older side.

Where else? -- And what else do you look for in a good playground for the kids? "