CHRIS SCIRIA'S LATEST COLUMN

Sciria: What if Donald Trump bought the Buffalo Bills?

2014-04-03T06:05:00Z Sciria: What if Donald Trump bought the Buffalo Bills?Chris Sciria | chris.sciria@lee.net Auburn Citizen
April 03, 2014 6:05 am  • 

Barely a week after owner Ralph Wilson's death, billionaire Donald Trump says he's interested in buying the Buffalo Bills with the intention the team stays in western New York.

That's a noble idea that I'm sure gives Bills fans a mixed state of emotions. Sure, he says he wants to keep the team in the Buffalo area but what kind of owner would Trump make?

Forget about the hurdles that Trump would have to overcome to buy the Bills. NFL rules say owners can't own casinos like Trump does in Atlantic City, N.J.

Trump could transfer the casinos to his children. That's set.

Then there's the question of whether the 31 other NFL owners would welcome the bombastic, controversial Trump to their exclusive club.

Jerry Jones was approved, right?

Call me crazy, but I bet Trump could sweet talk his way to approval. Never mind that he was the guy who led the old USFL's anti-trust lawsuit against the NFL in the 1980s (ancient history). Money talks, and Trump speaks the same language as the Robert Krafts and Paul Allens.

C'mon, if The Donald really wants to buy a NFL team, he will do it. He usually gets his way.

What would a Trump-owned Buffalo Bills team be like?

I have some ideas.

First, the name would have to change. We all know that whatever he owns, has the Trump name on it. So how do the Buffalo Trumps sound? Beats the Los Angeles Bills, right fans?

Of course the jersey and logo would have to change, too. Imagine a wispy red/white swirl on the helmets, similar to the owner's famous hairstyle.

The jerseys would be gold. No, not gold colored, actual 48 karat gold would be interwoven into the jerseys. Nothing says Trump like the opulence of real gold.

As for where the Trumps would play, knowing Trump, he would spare no expense in building the biggest stadium in sports. No, it wouldn't have the most seats, it would be a domed stadium overlooking Niagara Falls.

And it would be at the base of a 100-story building with condos overlooking the falls. Each Trump player would get free use of one of these condos.

Each player would have their own chauffeured limousine plus a chef and nannies for child care. 

Such treatment would make the Trumps the favorite to land the best NFL free agents, which of course would make them Super Bowl favorites.

Who would coach the Trumps? Nothing against Doug Marrone, a fine coach but Trump would want someone with charisma, personality, a go-getter.

In other words, Trump would name himself the coach. If he can run a multi-billion dollar business, a NFL team would be child's play. Anyone can do the x's and o's but leadership is what separates the great teams from the good ones.

Just imagine the pre-game speeches. "Win or you're fired!"

So what do you think, Bills fans?

Could Donald Trump be the man to finally lead the Bills, er, Trumps, to that long-awaited Super Bowl victory?

Sciria, The Citizen's assistant news editor can be reached at chris.sciria@lee.net or on Twitter, @csciria

Copyright 2015 Auburn Citizen. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

(1) Comments

  1. bmwood
    Report Abuse
    bmwood - April 03, 2014 10:52 am
    A couple of thoughts. If Trump were the owner he would not stand for failure and would do anything to win.

    On the other hand, he would have absolutely no problem changing his mind and selling if this what he wanted to do.
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